i wish i could go and hug him real tight and ask him not to take no for an answer so i'd never have to let him go.
i never even told him how much i wanted to hug him too. and now he doesn't even say it to me anymore. and i miss him so much.
change is the new buzzword good ole obama has brought to us.
but not all change is good and happy and for the best. change is sad. when you're used to depending on someone for your happiness, when you're dreams are tied to someone or something something, and they get takn away for no good reason, or no reason you know or understand, and just one day, you're about to go to bed, and its taken away from you. leaving you with nothing but a broken heart, a depressed soul and eyes with tears that just never seem to stop. and the memories make you sad because you don't know if you can make any new memories and you dont understand what went wrong. its sad to know how one person can make a decision without understanding how much pain she's going to put two people through, just because she thinks she knows better. he tells me to have faith but its hard. i can't let go. it hurts too much. its not right when two people have never had problems with each other and tried to do everything the right way and made sure we always had the bigger picture in mind...have what's theirs stolen like that. its not right, how it happened was not right.
its even sadder at how things are now. how we could talk for hours and know each other inside out, and now we stop ourselves from pouring our hearts out to each other, not because we dont want to or need to, but because some invisible hand is stopping us. like where there were a million words and feelings being expressed, now we try to hide them from each other in simple little msgs which mean nothing, yet mean everything. how are you supposed to give up someone just becuase someone said so, yet we both need each other more than ever? how can someone make you do that in these sad times of recession, depression, uncertainty, death and conflict: it was our little world that kept us happy and now nothing makes us happy. we had one great thing going for us and at the edge of getting it all and sealing the deal...we lost it.
so its sad when things change. and i'm still waiting and hoping on that miracle that changes it back.